Conversations Through the Window


HIM — “I’m here to pick up the new lenses that I ordered from you people. ” (You people is always a bad sign)

ME — “Okay, Mr. XYZ — is that eyeglass lenses or contact lenses?”

HIM — “Eyeglass lenses”

(Five minutes later after much rummaging through boxes and trays, no lenses can be turned up in the lab)

ME — “Mr. XYZ, are you sure you ordered eyeglass lenses ?”

HIM — “Yup”

(Back to the lab — more digging through boxes, more peering into trays, still no lenses)

ME — “Mr. XYZ — when did you order these lenses?”

HIM — “Let me check (pulls out cell phone)(has to dial 3 times before he can be heard by the other party) Hey Mrs. XYZ — when did we order your lenses?”

HER — “TWO WEEKS AGO” (I can hear her from five feet away)

HIM — “She says two weeks ago”

ME — “Okay, so they’re for your wife, not you.”

HIM — “Yeah, that’s what I told ya.”

(Which, of course, he didn’t)

Not that it made much difference, back to the lab. Still nothing for either XYZ.

ME — “Mr. XYZ, did you order new frames with your wife’s lenses?”

HIM — “Nope”

ME — “Will your wife be using her old frames for the lenses?”

HIM — “Nope”

(Quietly entering the twilight zone)

ME — “What will she be using to hold the lenses in front of her eyes?”

HIM — “Whaddya mean?”

ME — “If you ordered eyeglass lenses, there has to be a frame to put them into so that you can look through them”

HIM — “Hold on — (out comes the cell phone again)(only has to redial twice this time) Hey Mrs. XYZ where’s the frame for your lenses?”

HER — “OH, DO THEY NEED IT? I’VE GOT IT HERE — I’LL BRING IT RIGHT DOWN“. (Honestly, this woman has pipes like Beverly Sills)

HIM — “She says she has it — she’s going to bring it right down”

Five minutes later — little lady comes in holding a very small contact lens case and hands it to me..

ME — “Oh, it was an order for contact lenses!!”

HIM — “Yeah, that’s what I told ya — you people never listen!!”



2 thoughts on “Conversations Through the Window

  1. This reminds me of my experiences doing floortime at the antiques shop (which consists of walking around with the keys and opening cases and generally helping customers). Customer spots me – I’m wearing an Antiques Marketplace T-shirt and a name tag, and swinging my bunch of keys. He/she says: “Do you work here?” Duh! And there are those who walk right by me, go up to the desk and ask there if someone could open a showcase for them. Double duh!

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